I cannot say how much of a relief that was. I also can’t express how much rage I felt. Rage at the world. Rage at the society that tormented, taunted and jeered at people who were dying from AIDS. Rage at people hiding behind their religion standing at the edge of AIDS walks and candlelight vigils yelling at us that they all deserved to die. Rage at the nature of life and death in general. But mostly at myself.